100 word assignments – WEEK 50

American Gothic 

He came just before the harvest.

The sun kissed corn was ripe and the neighbours ranches had all the hands they needed. He was just another drifter with a twinkle in his eye but father knew at once he would be trouble. Yet he could not work alone and the winter would not wait. So he hung his pride and hired him while mother bit her lip.

That winter, the rain turned the road into a river and we never saw him again.
But the barn is full and, though the township spurn us, we eat.

And I dream.

This time, I’ll tell my parents that my son will have a brother.

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23 thoughts on “100 word assignments – WEEK 50

    • In a sort of wistful carefree voice, like she not really connected with reality. Bet her folks look after her kids as I imagine her be a bit scatty. Cheers Lorraine

    • She’s done it all before, probably last season or the one before that. I tried to make it sound like she’s not really connected with reality or the consequences of her actions. Her folks know and wish she’d take more responsibility.

    • That wasn’t the deal, really, although it might have sounded like it. Mum and dad know what their daughter’s like and it happened anyway as she’s irresponsible and the buck just wants some fun after work, so he is too, but they’r all like that, so what can you do? Probably wasn’t too impressed with her dad’s entreaties either. There was probably a lot of clandestine rolls in the hay when they thought no one was looking. Hope I got the melancholy and dreaminess across. She’s not too bright. Cheers.

  1. Well done, Ventahl! I really like the voice and cadence; the line Yet he could not work alone and the winter would not wait. has a really lovely rhythm to it that fits this melancholy story quite well. Good dig at the end, too; it brings all of the foreshadowing together nicely.

    • Tried to get the dreaminess and irresponsibility over in the tone, Mayumi. She’s sad and aware, but doesn’t care. Of course, its all happened before and her parents want her to grow up. They’ll probably end up caring for both half sibs and she just dreams and rolls with men who talk. Hence the townships disapproval. Not sure how all this will work out in the end. Glad of your feedback.

      • I got that sense of irresponsibility, for sure. 🙂 I also liked the way you just touched on the previous misconceptions (if you’ll pardon the pun), without needing to go into any detail. The reader understands how things got that way, why, and what likely happens next…or again, if you prefer. 🙂

  2. I get not necessarily lack of responsibility, but inevitability. Things happen. Perhaps she could have taken more control over the situation, but maybe she had no models for doing so? In any case, nice example of how a few words can say so much.

    • Good point. Inevitability over irresponsibility? Fate vs Free will. Time old discussion for another forum. A lack of role models could well have led to her skewed values. Glad this has prompted so many comments. Cheers.

    • Never read it, but now that you have, I think I will! It wasn’t the inspiration. Its a poem, as much as I’ve gleaned. Cheers for making the comparison, its made me dig a bit deeper.

  3. I too liked the voice, the tone, the mood , the cqdence, the
    “sun kissed corn was ripe and the neighbours ranches had all the hands they needed.”
    “This time, I’ll tell my parents that my son will have a brother.”

    it was dream-like, wistful, unconcerned and mournful….

    • I wanted a farm girl’s view that wasn’t quite connected with her situation. Things just seem to happen to her, without her taking any responsibility for her actions. Her parents try to protect her but know she’s heading down a wayward path without realizing it. Bit tragic really.

    • Probably neither. She’s ambivalent to both, I reckon. No doubt she’ll have three spots of hope before long. Hope they don’t all grow up as dispossessed as her. Hope to see you next week.

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